Goin' Up the River.
I would like to believe that it's not so odd for a young American male to have given a lot of thought to incarceration. I certainly had reason to consider how I would face jail time, and maybe even a short stay in prison. Sometimes I take a few moments to pause and appreciate just how lucky I have been to have a spot-clean record. The most serious thing I have ever been charged with is "disorderly conduct", which was merely a summary offense. For that I spent ten minutes telling a sob story to a policeman from the back of a cruiser. It was embarrassing, but carried no weight of serious consequence.
Truth be told, there are a number of things that could have landed me in the hoosegow. Before you reel in shock, keep in mind that an involvement in a barfight can evolve into an assault charge. Remember too that it only takes a couple of drinks to qualify you for a D.U.I. and a weekend in lockup. And that's not to mention the number of occasions I was with friends who were actively flouting the law... or the times I was made an unwilling accesory by simply listening to an alcohol-induced confession. When you break it all down, life as an American male can be a perilous journey. "There but for the grace of God....", if you believe in all of that. Or maybe I really am careful.
Anyway, watching that DVD set of OZ has me thinking about all of this again. It's likely now that I will avoid ever having to become an inmate. My testosterone levels are staadily dropping, and the common vices no longer interests me. But one can never know for sure. Bad situations don't confine themselves to your life schedule. Perhaps we are never totally in the clear. It's also true that there are people in our nation's correctional institutions that are truly innocent of the crimes with which they've been charged. That reality makes us all potential victims of circumstance.
So it's natural for me to wonder what type of strategy I would adopt if I had to enter a facility like the "Emerald City" cell block in OZ. I know from my readings that I would like to "do my own time". That requires asking for no favors and minding one's own business. I wouldn't ask anybody why they were there. I wouldn't initiate any eye contact. And I wouldn't start a conversation with anyone. But on the other side, I wouldn't want to give the impression that I thought I was better than anyone else- because that could be misconstrued as a challenge. It's enough to be an older white man among a teeming mass of young minority bucks, without setting myself up for any additional trouble.
I have a few skills that might be useful in prison. I have writing and drawing skills. I could probably offer them in exchange for the bare necessities. Maybe they would earn me a modicum of respect. I could make greeting cards for the other inmates. I could write letters for them to their loved ones. I'm fairly well-read and I could make a transition to prison law. Hanging out in the prison library reasearching the finer points of our "justice system" would likely be a reasonably safe place for me.
I'd also have the advantage of friends and relatives who would be willing to deposit regular amounts of cash on my books to be used for commisary. I'm thrifty, and I'm sure I could make the best use of those resources. Little things we take for granted on the side go a long way in that environment.
One thing I'd try hard not to do is get close to anyone too fast. I'd want to remain detached until I understood the web of interactions and alliances of my surroundings. If I had to serve a long term though, I would probably have to develop a few allies. That would take a lot of careful and thoughtful maneuvering. I'd want to avoid getting ensnared in the power dynamics of prison life, but who knows if I'd be able to protect myself without assistance? If I saw trouble coming, I'd likely have to "bite the bullet" and associate myself with one of the groups of white inmates. It would be distasteful to join the Aryan Brotherhood or the Bikers, but as a last resort it could be necessary to form a loose affiliation. Otherwise I'd just have to get myself in protective custody for the duration.
Christ, what a bleak prospect! This train of thought is an effective reminder to do everything I can to avoid ever having to serve time. And who says punisment is not a deterrent? There's surely no way to accurately assess the amount of people that have abstained from crime for fear of landing in jail or prison.
Truth be told, there are a number of things that could have landed me in the hoosegow. Before you reel in shock, keep in mind that an involvement in a barfight can evolve into an assault charge. Remember too that it only takes a couple of drinks to qualify you for a D.U.I. and a weekend in lockup. And that's not to mention the number of occasions I was with friends who were actively flouting the law... or the times I was made an unwilling accesory by simply listening to an alcohol-induced confession. When you break it all down, life as an American male can be a perilous journey. "There but for the grace of God....", if you believe in all of that. Or maybe I really am careful.
Anyway, watching that DVD set of OZ has me thinking about all of this again. It's likely now that I will avoid ever having to become an inmate. My testosterone levels are staadily dropping, and the common vices no longer interests me. But one can never know for sure. Bad situations don't confine themselves to your life schedule. Perhaps we are never totally in the clear. It's also true that there are people in our nation's correctional institutions that are truly innocent of the crimes with which they've been charged. That reality makes us all potential victims of circumstance.
So it's natural for me to wonder what type of strategy I would adopt if I had to enter a facility like the "Emerald City" cell block in OZ. I know from my readings that I would like to "do my own time". That requires asking for no favors and minding one's own business. I wouldn't ask anybody why they were there. I wouldn't initiate any eye contact. And I wouldn't start a conversation with anyone. But on the other side, I wouldn't want to give the impression that I thought I was better than anyone else- because that could be misconstrued as a challenge. It's enough to be an older white man among a teeming mass of young minority bucks, without setting myself up for any additional trouble.
I have a few skills that might be useful in prison. I have writing and drawing skills. I could probably offer them in exchange for the bare necessities. Maybe they would earn me a modicum of respect. I could make greeting cards for the other inmates. I could write letters for them to their loved ones. I'm fairly well-read and I could make a transition to prison law. Hanging out in the prison library reasearching the finer points of our "justice system" would likely be a reasonably safe place for me.
I'd also have the advantage of friends and relatives who would be willing to deposit regular amounts of cash on my books to be used for commisary. I'm thrifty, and I'm sure I could make the best use of those resources. Little things we take for granted on the side go a long way in that environment.
One thing I'd try hard not to do is get close to anyone too fast. I'd want to remain detached until I understood the web of interactions and alliances of my surroundings. If I had to serve a long term though, I would probably have to develop a few allies. That would take a lot of careful and thoughtful maneuvering. I'd want to avoid getting ensnared in the power dynamics of prison life, but who knows if I'd be able to protect myself without assistance? If I saw trouble coming, I'd likely have to "bite the bullet" and associate myself with one of the groups of white inmates. It would be distasteful to join the Aryan Brotherhood or the Bikers, but as a last resort it could be necessary to form a loose affiliation. Otherwise I'd just have to get myself in protective custody for the duration.
Christ, what a bleak prospect! This train of thought is an effective reminder to do everything I can to avoid ever having to serve time. And who says punisment is not a deterrent? There's surely no way to accurately assess the amount of people that have abstained from crime for fear of landing in jail or prison.
posted by Merge Divide at 9:49 PM
6 Comments:
Hello Dave,
Have you seen, George Bellows drawings at the Frick? Think if you have time, very interesting life and work.
No, I haven't had a chance to check it out. I rarely get to the Frick. But a couple people have recommended the exhibit. I'll try to see it.
I've actually given some thought to what I might focus on were I forced to do some jail time. I would use my CPA background to my advantage, and start preparing the warden's tax returns, along with those of the guards. Because I enjoy reading so much, I'd also try to start a prison library for the benefit of the inmates. Finally, to keep my manual dexterity honed, it's likely that I would want to develop my rock whittling skills. I'd probably still end up getting raped a few times before befriending someone with the power to stop that from occuring. All in all, I could probably handle it, as long as I had a starlet's poster to gaze upon during those endless lonely nights.
Geez, I've never imagined that, ever. From recent experience, spending 24 hours in a double hospital room was bad enough. That rape thing bothers me more than a bit, a thought I would not like to put behind me. So, if one has to consider the possibility, I'd opt for a co-ed facility (perhaps there's room at the Paris Hilton). I suppose I'd spend my days reading golf magazines, stare at the walls, and dream of a hole in one.
I do think Merge's idea of trading money from the outside for favors and protection on the inside is a very good idea indeed. I'll start putting some money aside just in case.
dagrims,
Yikes. You sound fairly nonchalant about the prospect of rape. But hey, adaptability is a good thing.
It might actually be in your interests to offer your financial skills to the inmate underground economy. Helping the guards might lead to more anal plundering. And from what I've heard, you can't count on protection from the guards.
anon,
Actually, from people who I've talked to who have been incarcerated, and the reading I have done... I've learned that the whole sexual exploitation thing is overblown (if you will).
The main thing is not to owe anybody anything. Hopefully, if you ever have to go to prison- you'll be old and ugly and less of an enticing target.
But if you get sent up for rape or pedophilia, it's open season.
Sorry, I had a Tim Robbins moment there.
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