Another Reason to Despise Dog Owners.
I've written before on this blog about how satisfied I am with the neighborhood I live in. Sure we have some grumpy-assed neighbors, but they generally keep to themselves and we pretend not to notice each other. However, over the last couple of weeks we did experience a singularly unpleasant phenomenon. One lazy weekend morning I was lounging on my front porch taking in a cigarette. I had my shoes off and my feet propped up on the metal railing, and I was feeling pretty carefree. That's when I noticed some foreign objects placed in a row in front of a big planter we have propped against the base of the porch along the sidewalk.
Upon closer inspection it was easy to identify the little round balls as dog shit. Curiously they seem to have been hand-placed by size, from largest to smallest. I seriously considered leaving the tableau there as a sign of someone's neglect for the neighborhood. Everyone on my street knows we don't own dogs. In fact I had cleaned our kitty litter boxes earlier in the morning, and had scant desire to deal with another animal's fecal droppings. But it was smack dab in the center of our rather narrow sidewalk, and I wanted even less to see some unwary walker smashing it and creating a long smudge of smelly streaks. So I pushed aside my distaste, and grabbed the broom. Luckily the stool was dry and I was able to sweep it out into the street. There was no way I was going to pick it up. Anyway, street cleaning is back, and so I knew that mess would be gone soon. Having done what little I could, I went inside to relax. I pushed the incident out of my mind.
However the next morning I was greeted with a replica of the previous day's scene. It was as if I had actually traveled back in time. It was an identical setup in the exact same location. This made me truly unhappy. I was less patient in sweeping the shit away this time around. And it turned out to be a more recent deposit, as it was quite soft and bright inside. This left track marks, and the smell wafted its way immediately into my nostrils. I told M. about what had happened, and she agreed to hose off the sidewalk for me. I was beside myself with hatred for humanity.
In the next week and a half, we were revisited by the perpetrator several additional times. We had even scrubbed the walk with bleach and detergent, hoping it would mask whatever scent the outlaw dog was attracted to. But it didn't stop the foul behavior. I couldn't conceive of how the pet's keeper could rationalize letting his mutt void itself right there in the middle of a high traffic area. Surely they could have found a less obtrusive spot. And how could a person justify not cleaning up after their dog? I wished with all my heart that I could catch the pair in the act. I fantasized about tailing them home, and coming back later with some special deliveries of my own. We figured out that this was happening sometime in the early morning, and neither of us had the time or energy for a stakeout. I resolved to find some way to stop this pattern.
I started my exploration with an intensive internet search. I was looking for something I could put down that would make the dog want to keep moving. Not surprisingly, many of the hints and suggestions that I could find were posted by dog lovers with the intention of advising dog owners. But they were my enemy, so I spent little time on those sites. I needed to find someone as pissed off as I was. If you spend enough time doing research, you can invariably find a fellow traveler. Most of the hints I discovered were posted by people who needed to keep dogs off of their front lawns. But I couldn't use pellets or motion-activated sprinkler systems on my sidewalk. I had to keep looking for the answer. A few folks were frustrated enough to recommend ground meat laced with antifreeze. That only seemed right to me if I could be assured that the dog's owner would eat it. I knew that it wasn't really the dog's fault. Dogs are just fucking stupid- that's all. It's the masters that are ultimately responsible for the misdeeds of their pets. Yet it was illuminating to see how many people harbor resentment against canines due to the inconsideration of so many of their "keepers".
My chosen solution seems to have worked so far. I poured half a bottle of concentrated bleach around the scene of the crime. I also moved the planter to the side of the house. Now I can only wait and see if I have permanently disrupted the dog's habits. We have also decided to post a sign that requests firmly (and politely) that dog owners respect the neighborhood by cleaning up after their dogs. The next step is to lay down a lot of rock salt on the walk. Apparently that dries out their paws until they crack and bleed. I would rather not be forced to take that measure. If you are reading this, and you love dogs... for the love of god, please be considerate of others in your community.
Upon closer inspection it was easy to identify the little round balls as dog shit. Curiously they seem to have been hand-placed by size, from largest to smallest. I seriously considered leaving the tableau there as a sign of someone's neglect for the neighborhood. Everyone on my street knows we don't own dogs. In fact I had cleaned our kitty litter boxes earlier in the morning, and had scant desire to deal with another animal's fecal droppings. But it was smack dab in the center of our rather narrow sidewalk, and I wanted even less to see some unwary walker smashing it and creating a long smudge of smelly streaks. So I pushed aside my distaste, and grabbed the broom. Luckily the stool was dry and I was able to sweep it out into the street. There was no way I was going to pick it up. Anyway, street cleaning is back, and so I knew that mess would be gone soon. Having done what little I could, I went inside to relax. I pushed the incident out of my mind.
However the next morning I was greeted with a replica of the previous day's scene. It was as if I had actually traveled back in time. It was an identical setup in the exact same location. This made me truly unhappy. I was less patient in sweeping the shit away this time around. And it turned out to be a more recent deposit, as it was quite soft and bright inside. This left track marks, and the smell wafted its way immediately into my nostrils. I told M. about what had happened, and she agreed to hose off the sidewalk for me. I was beside myself with hatred for humanity.
In the next week and a half, we were revisited by the perpetrator several additional times. We had even scrubbed the walk with bleach and detergent, hoping it would mask whatever scent the outlaw dog was attracted to. But it didn't stop the foul behavior. I couldn't conceive of how the pet's keeper could rationalize letting his mutt void itself right there in the middle of a high traffic area. Surely they could have found a less obtrusive spot. And how could a person justify not cleaning up after their dog? I wished with all my heart that I could catch the pair in the act. I fantasized about tailing them home, and coming back later with some special deliveries of my own. We figured out that this was happening sometime in the early morning, and neither of us had the time or energy for a stakeout. I resolved to find some way to stop this pattern.
I started my exploration with an intensive internet search. I was looking for something I could put down that would make the dog want to keep moving. Not surprisingly, many of the hints and suggestions that I could find were posted by dog lovers with the intention of advising dog owners. But they were my enemy, so I spent little time on those sites. I needed to find someone as pissed off as I was. If you spend enough time doing research, you can invariably find a fellow traveler. Most of the hints I discovered were posted by people who needed to keep dogs off of their front lawns. But I couldn't use pellets or motion-activated sprinkler systems on my sidewalk. I had to keep looking for the answer. A few folks were frustrated enough to recommend ground meat laced with antifreeze. That only seemed right to me if I could be assured that the dog's owner would eat it. I knew that it wasn't really the dog's fault. Dogs are just fucking stupid- that's all. It's the masters that are ultimately responsible for the misdeeds of their pets. Yet it was illuminating to see how many people harbor resentment against canines due to the inconsideration of so many of their "keepers".
My chosen solution seems to have worked so far. I poured half a bottle of concentrated bleach around the scene of the crime. I also moved the planter to the side of the house. Now I can only wait and see if I have permanently disrupted the dog's habits. We have also decided to post a sign that requests firmly (and politely) that dog owners respect the neighborhood by cleaning up after their dogs. The next step is to lay down a lot of rock salt on the walk. Apparently that dries out their paws until they crack and bleed. I would rather not be forced to take that measure. If you are reading this, and you love dogs... for the love of god, please be considerate of others in your community.
posted by Merge Divide at 9:50 PM
13 Comments:
Gee Dave,
For an intalect you sound like you harbor some real hate?
Anyone can go off like a child and hate, have you ever considerd the debree of smokers? There smoke drifting continuosly through the air,
EVERYONE btreathes, the butts EVERYWHERE. The fact that it is a fact of cancer? Itsa lota energy to dispize somthing, someperson, and the differance of these matters is choice, and intellagence. So what part of society can we controll our hate from next? We can learn about ourselves thru others actions, and our own.
You have omly opened a unaversal black hole on yourself, whatch your smell and debree the world awaits you!
marci
O.K.O
Despise, what I really mean to say, and correctly spell is,
get of your ass and pick up the shit!
Someone out there is working every day on cancer treatments for people like you.
Good thoughts and actions make the world go round, bad thoughts and actions, we all fall off.
marci
Marci,
"de·spise (dĭ-spīz')
tr.v., -spised, -spis·ing, -spis·es.
1. To regard with contempt or scorn: despised all cowards and flatterers.
2. To dislike intensely; loathe: despised the frigid weather in January.
3. To regard as unworthy of one's interest or concern: despised any thought of their own safety."
Somehow I knew I would evoke the ire of one of my dog-owning friends. But you seem particularly defensive about this post. Don't worry- I like you AND your dog, even if she did piss all over my hardwood floors when I agreed to let her chill in my house.
Your positive qualities outweigh whatever baggage you carry as a breathlessly defensive dog owner.
Still, your response was predictable. You accuse me of going off "like a child and hate (sic)", yet I didn't see a reasoned comment addresiing the points of my post- but rather a rant about cigarette smoking. I re-read my original post, wondering if somehow a reader could misconstrue the argument I was making. Alas I can't see how you read it as a debate over smoking.
Anyway, you followed your initial judgmental and preachy comment with another suggesting I clean up after the dog myself- "get of (sic) your ass and pick up the shit!" Is that your solution?
That's the kind of thing I would expect to see from someone who wants to push their responsibilities onto someone else. That's not really what you're like, is it Marci? I hope not.
I hope you clean up after your dog, because when YOU decided to take her in, you became responsible for her and her actions. You do realize that, right?
Hey... I was willing to extend the benefit of the doubt to the pig who refused to clean up after his/her dog. The first time it happened, I figured that maybe the individual was just too wrapped up in themselves and their own problems to do the right thing. But after the FOURTH time, that person DESERVED to be despised (consult definition above).
Don't make excuses for other people. Don't be an enabler, Marci.
Hey dave,
I don't know who marci you writting to, my dog never pissed on your floor, I am sure. I feel so
low after my dogs bad behavior I do remember these things.
And isnt it a fact you started your blog.taking a smoke on the porch? And we could always continue on bad behavior...marci
Defensive?
I can honestly say, I smiled all through your post and mine.
And Dave, what is a friend really?
Fortunitly or unfortunatly, we are all responsible for life on this planet, and as it turns, the planet too. Ny part in the enable is to show who you really are. And,
goodluck with your shit.
You make me lauph out loud, and I do not do enouph of that, thanks marci
Marci,
Yes, indeed I did begin the post with me smoking a cigarette on the porch, but that was incidental to the story. I have written about the smoking ban, and I understand the anti-smoking perspective. That being said, I pick up my butts and refrain from smoking indoors around non-smokers. Even at home, I smoke outside.
Bad behavior? Well, sure... but again, that's an entirely different conversation. If we deflect a specific discussion of the behavior of dog owners toward smoking, then we might as well talk about SUVs, the oil crisis, the War on Iraq, and global warming.
As far as your dog pissing on my floor- that's how I remembered it... but I'm willing to question my memory if you said it never happened. If it didn't, then I apologize about the mistaken accusation.
As far as "defensive" goes, I've got no other option then to take what you write at face value. Smiles and laughs and intonation are not observable over the internet (that's why people have invented all those goofy "emoticons").
Anyway, I'm glad you found the original post "funny", even though you said I sounded like I "harbor some real hate". Despite my peevishness about this series of incidents, I did want to inject some humor into it.
Your part is to show how I am? Or who "Merge Divide" is? I'm not clear that I follow you on that.
I'm also confused about "What is a friend, really?"
Explain, Woman!
I'm totaly entertained by the post and comments, and compelled to respond.
I think at this point, even if you've solved this problem, you owe it to yourself to find out who the culprat is. You might be totaly surprised.Maybe make a new friend. I'd be curious. P-man
P-man,
I am completely curious as to who it was, but if I have a choice I'd rather not have to be in the position to find out. It hasn't happened for a few days now, and I'm keeping my fingers crossed.
Unless it happens again, and I feel compelled to get up at 5AM and peep through my front window... I guess I'll never know.
Thanks for the apoligy on the pee, question. Honestly, my dog is worse, the type that bites other dogs. An "act of dog" some say. I feel its awful shamefull and somehow Its my fault. That being said, recently I was visiting a friend in town, who has a dog, and the neibor has a dog, and everyday for 5 days we saw many a dog at frick park all sniffing tales to say hello and running and play. Then, the last day Iknocked on the neibors door, said can your dog play, since shes tied up and yelps, and all the dogs have met and so Im in the yard ...and dog FIGHT!
My dog being the biggist, took that kinda bite, and sent one dog to vet(dog is fine). I did have to pay part of the bill, the guy was really trying to be a friend, was very genorous with his heart and took time to talk about the situation and gave a willing amount to docter the incodent, we learned alot that day, more about humans than dogs really.I know, I knocked on his door, and he was a friend to me ,I like him, I know him and I trust him, I hope he feels the same of me.
Of coarse about the cigs, I admire
your way of keeping butts in pockets, and 6ft or more you tower over most.......I have no dispute with smokers or banes or no bans....its just the same as dog do do or not todo to me, what negative happens, good to talk about and make a positive do about. Maybe I question hate because my own experiance, I love having a dog, and I have hated, dogs like people are difficult.
I think I should stay in the woods.
And my damn dog.
I would like to think I found this nearly dead dog for good , and everything has purpose and life gives you what you need, but it aint as easy as smelly shit on a step.
Dogs usually dont move when they are crappin. I suspect that someone is doing a turd installation and maybe watching you react. Animal lover here - dogs, cats, elephants or mice. We can learn something and be entertained by all of them. I'm allegric to cats (Bengal to Tabby) or I would have several cats also. Today I'm pissed off because a dog walker has allowed their dog to spray and kill some shrubs in my front yard. Some dog owner isnt teaching manners. I love the French dog attitude. I remember sitting in a Paris restaurant next to a table with a well mannered dog sitting on the floor beside their owner at the adjoining table. It was assumed the dog had good manners or it wouldnt be there. It's all about the owner. Dogs want to be pleasers - that dog owner who allowed their dog to spray my shrubs and maybe walk and poop on your walk is irrespondsible - it is NOT the dog. Sometimes they do get excited and pee when they shouldnt (ever piss yourself laughing?) Get a dog for you and the cats and you will all learn something and have great fun - wish I could. (use white vinegar instead of bleach) JM
The whole incident is somewhat unreal...well, not to you, but that someone would have come up with such a plan to essentially piss you off. Very strange behavior, indeed.
One question comes to mind here...have you considered doing a collection for an upcoming show?
I myself like dogs for the most part, but only if they belong and are cared for by someone else. The last one here, who broke our rule of no dogs in this house because it was kinda like family, poo'd on the first carpet he came to. Yes, I suppose we could have pulled up the carpets, but some of them are actually nailed down. As for the dog vs smoke/butt thing, I'd have no trouble if they banned both from public places (except for seeing eye dogs, of course). By the way, those signs that say "No dogs allowed, except for seeing eye dogs"...who are those signs for? Anyway, we walk around our development most nights. Last night there was dog poop in the middle of the walking path, and it wasn't the first time. I've never seen cigarette butts there, but if there had been and I stepped on one, at least I wouldn't be having to clean my shoe and scrub our carpets upon coming home.
I think anyone who leaves or throws anything on the ground not biodegradable within 30 seconds should be put on road cleanup duty. Or, alternately, clean my carpets.
At my grandparents there was a dog usually a Daushund in the house, roaming around the yard a was Collie, and in the dog pen usually 3 or more Coon hounds. We never stepped in dog dirt and we never got bit. We never stepped in dog dirt because they did it behind the garage and my grandmother had easy accessable means of scooping up accidents during training. We never got bit because biting dogs got the bullet to heaven. Walt Disney lead us to believe that dogs have human thoughts and emotions - we believed him - easier than understanding animals. Today in the city I see people walking loading weapons (Pit Bulls), dogs spastic to control (Border Collies), dogs looking for the water (Labs), dogs trying to smell a rabbit (Beagles) and dogs looking for a job (German Sheperds) on and on. Too many naive Americans do not consider the natural instincts the dog was bred for and the dog lives a miserable life regardless of the vet bills. I have a friend on a farm that I visited recently that runs an "orpanage" for Great Pyrenese dogs. Guilty conscience, former owners from usually urban situations pay dearly to have the adorable grown up puppy of 80lbs.+ given a more suitable home. On my last visit it was easier for me, as an unattached stranger, to send a mean dog to heaven and do a favor for my friend. This is all common sense and reality too often lacking in urban dog owners. It's OK with me to despise irrespondsible dog owners but my grandmother would think you had a cold heart if you didnt like dogs and you probably wouldnt be invited to stay for dinner (worth faking it for). JM
JM, good points about selecting a dog suitable to it's surroundings. Just one comment about something you said, "We never got bit because biting dogs got the bullet to heaven. " That would presume one of two things. First, that someone got bit (other than you), since you knew the consequences, or that the dog knew he'd get shot, which is likely only if he had been shot before by someone with a dreadful aim. In any case, it does present a case for lowering the rate of recidivism through capital punishment. Ruff.
Post a Comment
<< Home